Loving Your Enemy (And Why We’d Rather Explain Jesus Away)
Read:
– Matthew 5:38–48
– Luke 6:27–36
If you want to get in trouble as a youth minister, teach these passages and tell students to take Jesus seriously.
Immediately, the pushback starts.
“But my dad says if a bully hits you, you hit them back twice as hard.”
“So I’m just supposed to let myself get beat up?!”
By the next day, expect a few angry phone calls and several emails typed in ALL CAPS.
Adults don’t respond much differently. We just get more sophisticated. We ask questions that sound thoughtful but are really attempts to explain Jesus away.
“What about war?”
“What about the Nazis?”
“What if someone breaks into your house?”
Whether we’re young or old, we have a shared instinct to soften, qualify, or outright ignore what Jesus says here. Because this teaching feels dangerous. Unrealistic. Impossible.
And maybe that’s because it is dangerous. Just not in the way we think.
Reflection Questions
When you read these passages, what is your gut or emotional reaction?
How have you heard these verses taught in the Church?
Beyond “An Eye for an Eye”
Jesus begins by referencing a familiar principle: “An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.”
That phrase comes from Israel’s law, and it was actually a moral advance in its time. It limited revenge. It said punishment should be proportional, not escalated. In a world where violence tended to spiral, this was a step toward justice.
But Jesus doesn’t stop there.
He treats even proportionate retaliation as part of the old way of being human. He calls His followers beyond revenge altogether. Not because evil should be ignored, but because responding to evil with evil never actually breaks its power.
When Jesus says, “Do not resist an evildoer,” He is not telling us to be passive or helpless. He is rejecting revenge. He is calling for something far more subversive: resistance that refuses to become what it opposes.
This is not pacifism. It is nonviolent resistance.
It is active. Strategic. Courageous.
It confronts injustice without mirroring it.
Reflection Questions
What is the difference between pacifism and nonviolent resistance?
Can you think of moments in history where nonviolent action led to real change?
Do you believe Jesus is right here?
Enemy-Love and the Freedom We’ve Forgotten
Jesus doesn’t separate turning the other cheek from loving enemies. They belong together.
Enemy-hood works by the logic of retaliation.
Enemy-love works by the strange, divine logic of grace.
Enemy-hood traps us. It dictates our reactions. It shrinks our moral imagination.
Enemy-love restores our freedom.
Enemy-hood allows evil to shape us.
Enemy-love overcomes evil with good.
The world destroys its enemies.
And here’s something we all need to hear again:
Followers of Jesus are not allowed to have enemies.
The moment someone is placed in the category of “enemy,” Jesus immediately commands us to love them. Which means the category itself collapses. Love refuses to let hatred have the final word.
This does not mean tolerating abuse.
It does not mean erasing boundaries.
Healthy, firm boundaries are often essential to peacemaking.
But it does mean we refuse to let bitterness, vengeance, or dehumanization rule our hearts.
Reflection Questions
Do you have anyone you consider an enemy?
How are you seeking peace with them, even if boundaries are necessary?
What is keeping you from loving them?
Imagine If We Took Jesus Seriously
What would the Church look like if we actually lived this way?
What would our politics, our social media, our relationships, and our witness look like?
What would change if everyone who claimed to follow Jesus treated enemy-love not as a metaphor, but as a command?
These teachings are not sentimental.
They are revolutionary.
They threaten systems built on fear, power, and revenge.
Which is exactly why Jesus taught them.
Reflection Questions
How would the Church be different if it truly lived this out?
How would the world be different?
A Practice for the Week
When you hear the word “enemy,” who comes to mind?
Notice what you feel when you think of them.
Gently release those thoughts and emotions to God. This takes practice.
One helpful tool is a prayer sometimes called a “loving kindness” practice. Though it comes from outside the Christian tradition, many believers have found it deeply compatible with Jesus’ call to pray for those we struggle to love.
With your enemy in mind, pray slowly:
May they experience God’s love.
May they experience God’s peace.
May they experience God’s mercy.
May they experience God’s joy.
May they experience God’s kindness.
Try writing a short version of this prayer in your own words and repeating it throughout the day. Pay attention to what changes, even subtly, within you.
Prayer
God of Love,
While we were still Your enemies, You loved us.
While violence nailed You to a cross, You prayed for mercy and forgiveness.
Help us grow in love, even for those we struggle to love.
Begin the slow work of reshaping our hearts,
Even when obedience comes before understanding.
– Amen.