By: Pastor Jeremy Hall, Senior Pastor
Did you know there are two St. Valentines?
Both Valentine of Rome and Valentine of Terni are remembered and celebrated on February 14th—Saint Valentine’s Day. While the details of their lives remain somewhat obscure and their legacies have become intertwined, the stories associated with St. Valentine remind us of the power of sacrificial love and faithfulness.
Valentine was likely a Roman priest or bishop who defied Emperor Claudius II’s ban on soldiers marrying by secretly performing Christian weddings. This act of defiance landed him in prison. There, he befriended the daughter of his jailer.
Even though she represented the system that oppressed his church, the Empire that had put him in prison, and was family to the man who would soon carry out his execution, Valentine showed her extraordinary compassion—healing her blindness, according to legend.
On the eve of his execution, (if you’re so inclined you can go visit his decapitated skull at “Basilica di Santa Maria in Cosmedin” in Rome, Italy) he sent her a note signed, “From your Valentine,” an act of tenderness that echoes through history.
Valentine’s devotion to Christ ultimately led to his martyrdom. His legacy as a symbol of
sacrificial love continues to inspire us today. Recognized as a saint by Catholic, Orthodox,
Lutheran, Episcopal, and Anglican churches, Valentine is remembered as the patron saint of love, happy marriages…and beekeeping (There’s always a weird one in the list, isn’t there?).
But what does St. Valentine teach us about love, and more importantly, what does the Bible teach us about love?
I’m sure you’ve heard before that there are multiple Greek words for “love” in the New Testament. The English word “love” has to do a lot of heavy lifting. We say:
I love the Steelers.
I love my wife.
I love hot wings.
I love my children.
I love Star Wars.
I love my church.
The Greeks, on the other hand, were more precise, using four distinct words to express different types of love. Understanding these words helps us grasp the depth and
breadth of how God calls us to love.
Agapē (ἀγάπη)
Definition: Selfless, sacrificial, unconditional love; often associated with God’s love for humanity and the ideal love Christians are called to embody. Occurrences in the NT: ~116 times
Notable Verses:
John 3:16: “For God so loved (ἀγάπησεν) the world…”
1 Corinthians 13: Known as the “love chapter,” it describes the attributes of agapē.
1 John 4:8: “God is love (ἀγάπη).”
Agapē is the love we are called to have for God, for our neighbors, and for our enemies. It’s not driven by emotion or reciprocity but by a commitment to act in others’ best interest. It’s the love St. Valentine demonstrated when he risked his life to perform Christian marriages.
Philéō (φιλέω)
Definition: Affectionate love; the warmth and deep personal affection often associated with friendship. Occurrences in the NT: ~25 times
Notable Verses:
John 11:35-36: “Jesus wept. So the Jews said, ‘See how He loved (ἐφίλει) him!’” (referring to Lazarus).
John 21:15-17: The exchange between Jesus and Peter uses both agapē and philéō,
highlighting their subtle differences.
Revelation 3:19: “Those whom I love (φιλώ), I rebuke and discipline.”
Jesus Himself demonstrated philéō when He called His disciples friends (John 15:15). This kind of love invites us into deep, Christ-centered relationships where we share life, burdens, and joys with one another.
Storgē (στοργή)
Definition: Familial love; the natural affection between family members. Occurrences in the NT: None (directly as a standalone word).
However, its derivative philostorgos (φιλόστοργος) appears in:
Romans 12:10: “Be devoted (φιλόστοργοι) to one another in love.”
Astorgos (ἀστόργος) (absence of familial love) appears in:
Romans 1:31 and 2 Timothy 3:3, describing a lack of natural affection as part of human
sinfulness.
Storgē reminds us of the bonds of love within families and the extended family of faith. It’s the foundation of so much of our human experience and a reflection of God’s nurturing care for His children.
Éros (ἔρως)
Definition: Romantic or passionate love; often associated with physical desire or attraction. Occurrences in the NT: None
While éros is not directly mentioned in the New Testament, it is celebrated in the Greek version of the Song of Solomon and understood as part of God’s design for human relationships. In the context of marriage, éros becomes a reflection of God’s covenant love—a holy expression of affection and intimacy.
In the New Testament, these four loves together give us a fuller picture of how God calls us to love Him and one another. The story of St. Valentine, a man who acted out of sacrificial agapē to honor God’s covenant of marriage, serves as a compelling reminder of what love looks like when rooted in divine purpose.
But God doesn’t call us to live only in the realm of sacrificial love. He invites us into a broader experience of love in our daily lives:
Agapē challenges us to love unconditionally, even when it’s difficult.
Philéō reminds us to nurture deep friendships that reflect Christ’s love.
Éros celebrates the beauty of romantic love within God’s design.
Storgē calls us to care for family and community with devotion and kindness.
Together, these loves point us back to the God who is love itself (1 John 4:8), calling us to
embody that love in every relationship we encounter.
Homework:
Spend some time with 1 Corinthians 13, sometimes called “the love chapter.” Reflect on these questions as you read:
Which attributes of agapē-love do you notice most in others?
Which do you most desire from others?
Which do you most desire from God?
Where do you recognize yourself in this list?
Which of these attributes do you need to cultivate in your own life?
“If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love (AGAPE), I am only a
resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all
mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love (AGAPE), I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to
hardship that I may boast, but do not have love (AGAPE), I gain nothing.
Love (AGAPE) is patient, love (AGAPE) is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love (AGAPE) does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
…
And now these three remain: faith, hope and love (AGAPE). But the greatest of these is love (AGAPE).”
Let’s follow St. Valentine’s example by embracing all these forms of love in ways that glorify God and bring us closer to one another.
Grace and Peace,
Pastor Jeremy